The Ultimate Merger

“Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate:  Mark 10:9

An inseparable team.  Isn’t that the way we envision love?  Isn’t that how love should be?  So in the era that we live in where the divorce rate is beyond a 50% failure rate, and church attendance is low, is there any wonder why marriages are failing?  Man is putting marriage together in our own carbon-copied image of what we think love is.  Distorted views and broken homes create the images that our children are watching, and broken, hurting, imperfect people are marrying out of images that are short of the ordained blessed life that God created when he brought Adam and Eve together in the garden.  What does it look like to be joined together by God?  Look at the holy trinity for a beginner’s lesson.  John 10:30 says that “I and the Father are one”.  Jesus – God, and the Holy Spirit are all one man that makes up the triune spirit of God.  You can not separate God from the Holy Spirit, You can not separate Jesus from the Holy Spirit, and you can not separate God from Jesus… all three are connected, inseparable.

So then what is the image of marriage as God puts together when he causes two spirits to unite as one?  It is the perfect image of the bride of Christ.  There is God, there is man, who is to love his wife as Christ loves the church, and there is woman… I may be going out on a limb here by representing her as the Holy Spirit in the trinity of marriage, but I will explain my train of thought for that.  The Holy Spirit is a helper; the wife was created to be a “help meet”.  “And the Lord God said, It is not good that man should be alone; I will make a help meet for him”.  God didn’t want us to live life alone – so he created another to be our help, what completes us and fills us, and makes us whole.  So why cant just any woman or man be that other half that is missing?  God created a certain and special, unique person to be Adam’s wife.  He put Adam to sleep and created her out of him.  “So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the mans ribs and then closed up the place with flesh.  Then the Lord God made woman out of the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.”  Genesis 2:21-22.  Can you imagine a partner made so intimately for you that she was made from something so close to your heart as a rib bone?  What does that look like?  For a start, God knows your heart.  He knows you intimately.  “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb” Psalm 139:13.  God knows you – and has known you since before creation.  He knows your likes, he knows your dislikes, he knows what makes you happy, he knows what makes you sad, he knows the most intimate details about you, and he wants to bring you a wife that will compliment those details and bring out the best in you through her. 

Your impatience to make life happen on your own terms could be the reason that God hasn’t brought her to you yet.  Sometimes it takes the trial and error, and the pain and heartbreak of trying to make it happen in your own strength for you to come to your senses and realize that only God knows the perfect woman for you – and he’s been hiding her from you until you’re ready to give him the reigns and allow you to have her.  “I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.”  Isaiah 45:3  Or ladies – turn it the other way around – that God has hidden him from you…  “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”  Matthew 6:33

Where can you come close enough to the heart of God to find your hidden treasure?  Start by living your life from a position of authentic worship, thankfulness, forgiveness, and humility.  Ask God to start revealing the dirt of your past to you – to bring it to the forefront so that what is brought to light, you will become set free, delivered and healed from.  God doesn’t want to give you a broken wife – and he loves her enough to not give her a broken husband.  Seek after wholeness and healing, seek after God.  Replace the head of the household with the one who created home.  Renew your mindset on what you picture a family to be like.  Are you caught up in an old mindset where you (men) are the head of the household and your wife is supposed to be submissive to you?  That makes you a deity – it doesn’t make you a husband – and she was NOT created to be your doormat – or your servant.  She was created to be your help meet – the one who comes along side you, she comes up to bat with you, the one who whispers in your ear “we’ve got this” when you’re not feeling so confident.  She is your help meet, the one that loves to laugh with you, loves to love you, and is there by your side – because you – love her like Christ loves the church.  Now there’s another image to dissect.  How would Jesus love your wife?  “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” Ephesians 5:25.  What does it mean to give yourself up?  To come to the end of you?  Would it mean to turn away from the things of the world – the pornography that you look at that makes her feel insecure about herself?  To escape from the gambling addiction that makes her insecure about your finances?  To let go of a demanding job that robs her of your time and makes her feel second class to the desire to be successful and wealthy?  Look in to your heart and see what God is calling you to be.  If you’re single, love the unknown, unrevealed treasure of your future wife by making steps now and deciding that you are going to be the man of God that she deserves to have.  Do you want to continue in the worldly way of doing love?  Having sex with any girl that will sleep with you?  Or do you want to have the kind of love that would fight to the death for you – and passionately love you like nobody’s business? 

~ It’s time to man up! 

~ It’s time to get real and find out what real love is.

~ It’s time to learn about the man that you should be by becoming like the one you are commissioned to become more like.  

Discover who Jesus is – become his reflection.  Do you picture Jesus as a docile, emasculated man who goes with the flow and doesn’t stand up for himself?  That’s not the Jesus I know.  “His eyes are like blazing fire, and on his head are many crowns. He has a name written on him that no one knows but he himself.”  Revelation 19:12  His eyes are like blazing fire, he wears many crowns – in our modern society how are those things achieved?    Why are his eyes on fire?  What does it do to you when you look into a fire?  You can’t look away can you? Can you imagine being so filled with love and passion that your wife – when she sees you – she sees only you – and not the man at work who is trying to get her attention?  Be that man… Wear your crowns of royalty that God has placed on your head, you are after all a king – and she is to be your queen.  Act in a way that is honorable and noble, be gentle with her, respect her, and be transparent to her.  Don’t allow walls to be put up that she can’t see over, or she’ll feel shut out.  Be as naked with her mentally and spiritually as you are when you’re making love to her.  Bring yourself to her and let her build you up and encourage you – let her know your hopes and dreams – and be vulnerable enough to tell her your fears and insecurities.  Yes guys – it is manly to let her see what makes you vulnerable.  Women have so many transparent vulnerabilities that sometimes it makes them feel like a weaker half. By showing her that you have vulnerabilities too will empower her to get stronger in the areas where she is weak – and in turn, she will stand by your side where you are weak.  Wouldn’t you rather take those weak spots and strengthen them, rather than hide them?

Can you see how this is all starting to tie in to becoming one?  By putting God as the head of yourself, and growing in your walk with Christ, becoming more Christ like will draw the perfect godly woman to you – God will bring you the woman that will be the piece of you that you have been missing.  This is your call to wake up – “ This is why it is said: “Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”  Ephesians 5:14.  Wake up and start becoming the best man of God that you can be – so that you will be given the bride of Christ.  And when he brings her to you – encourage her, love her limitlessly – be the reflection of Jesus that she needs you to be.  Be willing to fight for her, be willing to change for her, be vulnerable, be real, be a real man.  Draw a line in the sand and decide that today you are going to step up and change your future by becoming who God is calling you to be… pray with me

Dear God – Abba Father – I declare over the spirit life reading this to WAKE UP in the Name of Jesus Christ!  Put a new fire in them, a new passion, a new understanding and drive in them to become the man or woman of God that you had in mind for them before creation.  Bring a kingdom mindset and ground it securely within them that cannot be removed or stolen.  Bring healing and wholeness to the body, mind and spirit and help them to be one with you Lord.  Purify them and make them holy in your sight.  Give them strength and determination and patience for their journey.  Enlighten them with hope and truth by providing them with glimpses of their future.  Thank you daddy for a culture of new men that will be to women a direct representation of Jesus, and thank you for women who have a heart after yours God, that they will be empowered to be the women of God that you long them to be.  Remind them of their royalty and help them to walk in new strength and power as they fulfill your call.  In Jesus name Amen.